


Christmas

by bjfic_archivist



Category: Queer as Folk (US)
Genre: Canon, Improv
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2006-04-15
Updated: 2006-04-15
Packaged: 2018-12-27 05:11:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,461
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12074166
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bjfic_archivist/pseuds/bjfic_archivist
Summary: Brian and Justin are having a pretty long discussion (and not in a life affirming kind of way) about Christmas, and Justin is trying every possible tactic to get him to celebrate Christmas with him...





	Christmas

**Author's Note:**

> Note from IrishCaelan, the archivist: this story was originally archived at [The Brian/Justin Fanfiction Archive](http://fanlore.org/wiki/Brian_Justin_Fanfiction_Archive). To preserve the archive, I began importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in September 2017. I posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact me using the e-mail address on [The Brian/Justin Fanfiction Archive collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/bjfic/profile).

  
Author's notes: Brian's POV  


* * *

"Brian..."  
"No Justin. I have already told you I won't do it"  
"But... but it's Christmas"  
"Like I fucking give a shit"  
"Right, I nearly forgot. Brian Kinney does never give two shits about anything but himself"  
"That's not true Justin, and you know it" YEAH! I also give a shit about getting laid... and sucked.  
"So why don't you want to celebrate? Why can't we have a tree like everyone else does?"  
"Because we are not fucking straight people... That's why"  
"Who said only straight people celebrate Christmas?"  
"I did. The only thing queers ever celebrate is their sexuality and that's also in Pride Weekend only"  
"That's not true"  
"Damn right it is"  
"Then how come Emmett and Ted are celebrating Christmas?"  
"That's because they are pussies, Justin"  
"No, they're not... and stop making excuses Brian because it ain't going to work"  
"I'm not making excuses, Sunshine. I told you I am not celebrating Christmas and that's final. Now shut the fuck up about it..." Knowing Justin too well, I better think fast because I have another thing coming  
"I won't let you get away with it, Brian. I want us to celebrate it and have a tree"  
"If you want a fucking tree, go to the forest and have your way with Christmas_ ALONE"  
"Why are you being such an ASSHOLE?" Because I am Brian... remember?  
"I'm not being an asshole but rational. How the fuck are we supposed to get a fucking tree by Christmas I know all about advertising Justin, and people must be fighting for trees by now. I'm not going to fight over some lousy tree. Besides, it's fucking smelly. The whole loft will fucking stink..."  
"Stop being so prissy, mind you?"  
"I'm not prissy. All I want is for you to get off my back about it because it's not going to happen"  
"But I want us to be part of it"  
"Part of what...? A bunch of bored people sitting under a tree, chanting and praising the lord? No, thank you I have had enough of that at my mom's and even back then I puked all fucking holiday; it's fucking depressing, I tell you. And my father could never get me what I wanted..."  
"So here's your problem"  
"W=h=a=t  p=r=o=b=l=e=m?"  
"You don't like Christmas because you did not enjoy it with your folks"  
"I don't like Christmas because I see no point in sitting all together as one big, happy FAMILY, singing altogether in Harmony. It makes me want to puke. I tell you something more Sunshine, I fucking hate Christmas and you know why? Cause I have had enough of these FUCKED UP holidays to deal with, but no more Sunshine. I don't need a reason to buy you presents or spend more time with you"  
"Oh. In that case, I say you don't need a reason to turn me down"  
"Justin. Cut it out, will you? I'm not in the mood for this kind of shit so fucking drop it"  
"You are never in the mood for anything but SEX" Hey! That is completely untrue__ Sometimes I'm in the mood for a quick blowjob at Babylon or rimming.  
"Can you blame me?" I get closer, sending my hand over to take a hold of his stiff dick but he slaps it.  
"Don' you dare distracting me! This is fucking important. I won't have you teasing me while I'm trying to make a point". Oh, you'll have me teasing you anytime.  
"What IS your point exactly?"  
"My point is that you should try to be a bit more flexible" Well... why didn't you say so?  
"Like THAT?" I sneak my fingers inside his inviting piece of ass, moving them along his crack.  
"NOT... Uh GOD... like that... Stop" Did that word just come out of his mouth? Fucking unbelievable  
"Why should I?"  
"Because I said so, and you are SO not getting any of THAT until you agree" And I'm Jesus Christ.  
"Agree to WHAT?"  
"Agree celebrating Christmas with me" JESUS! Would you fucking drop it already?  
"You always find a way to kill the mood, don't you? I said no and don't try tempting me into agreement because I won't fall for it this time" Who am I kidding? I always fall for it.  
"Won't you?" He steps closer to me and gives me his best mischievous look. He knows he got me.  
"If you want to celebrate Christmas so badly, go and fucking have it at your parents' house"  
"Are you fucking shitting me?" he asks in disbelief, furrowing his brows. What the hell did I do now?  
"NO, what makes you say that? I thought you liked being there... seeing your mom and molly and Um... SHOOT" How could I fucking forget about this fucking father of his, who wouldn't accept him as his son. He was no different than MY old man, and never will be. Good thing he closed that door behind him and moved on... I wouldn't want to see him miserable.  
"SHOOT it is. How can I fucking go back there? I'm not even speaking with my old man for years now thanks to you. Better yet, I can't even look at him without having his spit all over my face. He's fucking ashamed of me, saying it's wrong for men to have hot passionate sex together, even though I have ever had felt anything more right. Don't you remember me leaving the house because he wouldn't accept my little "affair" with you? Pardon moi, silly me. I forgot_ Old men are having trouble remembering things that had happened two years ago"  
"OLD MEN?"  
"Don't tell me you have lost your hearing too. Poor baby..."  
"Don't you baby me Justin. And spare me your pity because it ain't welcome"  
"What's the matter, old man? Have I made you upset? Can I get you something Perhaps?"  
"My swat would be nice. Watch out Sunshine, because you are getting on my nerves"  
"It doesn't matter. There aren't any much left anyway" I have had enough of this shit.  
"You know what?"  
"WHAT?"  
"You are going to sleep on the couch tonight and no cock for you until tomorrow" That should end it.  
"Yeah right, and I'm mother Mary" Like moi, Justin is finding it hard to believe my threats.  
"I'm FUCKING serious. If you don't behave yourself, you'll be forced to finish yourself of"  
"That won't be much of a problem since I'm not that hard" Not THAT hard, huh? I bet I can change that  
"Right now you aren't" I push my pants all the way down and reveal my rock-hard cock.  
….. "I thought you just said no cock until tomorrow" Fucking kid! Doesn't he know me by now to tell I don't actually MEAN what I think I mean. I never AM serious... never will be.  
"I wasn't serious. Did you really believe that shit?"  
"Not for one fucking second. So..."  
"SO?"  
"Are we going to celebrate Christmas?" I never believed the day would come that my cock will soften.  
"No, Justin... we are not. If you want to celebrate it go and find yourself someone to do it with_ I don't mind. You can even call the fiddler, as far as I'm concerned. Do whatever you please... but PLEASE, I am begging you. Do not include me in it. Now I swear Sunshine, if you'll mention that again you ARE going to spend the night out of bed" I say and put my pants back on.  
"You don't really mean it"  
"I meant every word of it"  
"Even the fiddler?"  
"Alright, so not exactly EVERY possible word"  
"Brian?"  
"Don't fucking shit me"  
"But... but it's Christmas. It's not fucking fair. All I wanted is for us to celebrate" Next time I hear that word. Why can't he fucking drop it already?! CHRIST!  
"Who told you not to? You CAN celebrate it with whoever you want. Sort of"  
"Not without you"  
"And why is that?"  
"Brian. God damn it! I cannot go and celebrate somewhere else. I want to have it with you"  
"But aren't you forgetting something, my dear?"  
"Forgetting what?"  
"About what I fucking want... I have already told you. I don't do celebrations or holidays"  
"Along with the other stuff you don't do. You're so fucking boring. How can I stand living with you?" Oh, you stand it just fine; "That's because I treat your bubble butt five fucking times a day..."  
"Is that a talent or what?"  
"EXACTLY"  
"You aren't going to get away with this" Watch me.  
"I really have to take my beauty rest now"  
"BRIAN!"  
"NOW what?"  
"We're in the middle of an important discussion referring Christmas and you can't just leave the room and take your beauty rest. We haven't finished talking..."  
"Maybe you didn't. I have said all I had to a long time ago. Now if you'll excuse me..."  
"You are not excused, Brian! We haven't talking yet"  
"WE could wrap this up LATER Justin. I really have some more important things to do"  
"Like what? Jacking off...?"  
"HEY! At least my dick doesn't give me a headache"  
"Excuse me? Am I hearing what I think I am hearing?"  
"You've heard it just fine! I won't have you telling me what to do. You aren't my god damn mother"  
"I'm not your mother alright but I AM your boyfriend and as long as I am living with you..."  
"WHAT? As long as you're living with me you will decide how I should live my life and what holidays do I celebrate around here? It is MY fucking loft and I shall do whatever I feel like doing"  
"It's not what I meant. As long as I'm living here, you'll have to treat me as an equal"  
"Treating you as an equal is one thing and having you bossing me around is another"  
"I am not bossing you around, Brian. I just want us to celebrate Christmas together. What the hell is so wrong with that, huh? I promise you we'll have a great time. You just have to trust me"  
"I don't get it. I REALLY don't get it. Is it THAT fucking critical to you? Let it go already"  
"Because I want us to..."  
"To celebrate... yeah, I got it. You're telling me to treat you as an equal being where as in fact you don't treat me as one. I listened to what you had to say, I thought about it and..."  
"BULLSHIT! You hadn't even given it a simple thought"  
"Well maybe it is because I don't want to. Have you thought about THAT? I bet you didn't. I've already told you that you CAN celebrate, just not here, not with me. Go to Debbie's or go out with Daphne"  
"NOT FAIR"  
"Huh?"  
"I thought couples do stuff together. I thought they go to the malls and having dinners and going to the movies but I guess I was wrong. Look at Michael and Ben_ they go out together"  
"First of all- Don't you ever compare us to other COUPLES. We are not like the others. Second of all, we ARE going out together... Every day actually"  
"I didn't mean clubs and parties, Brian. I meant going out to be together, with one another ALONE and not having a threesome in the backroom of Babylon. I also don't think watching you fuck other guys is much fun either" Isn't much fun? Is he fucking shitting me? He fucking loves watching me...  
"You liked it so far. It makes you fucking horny... and then we go home and I fuck your brains out"  
"Great Brian... just great!"  
"It IS. It's fucking hot and sticky... and we do it all night long"  
"It's not what I meant. See?"  
"WHAT? Oh! Would you look at THAT?"  
"SHUT UP!"  
"We will have to do something about your little fellow over there"  
"Little fellow? Brian, he isn't that small. Maybe in comparison to yours but that doesn't really count"  
"Yeah, I guess not. No dick could ever compare to mine"  
"RIGHT. Now what do you say?"  
"You really aren't going to shut up about it, are you?"  
"Uh huh"  
"And you aren't going to get the hell off my back and let me fuck you until I say yes"  
"Indeed. Aren't you clever baby?"  
"Shut the fuck up, damn it!"  
"What if I don't?"  
"I'll make you to"  
"How exactly will you do that?"  
"Where is the smart little blond who got 500 on his SAT's?"  
"How the fuck do I know?! Now listen up Brian, because I'm telling you it once and I won't say it again if you won't agree on celebrating and buying a Christmas tree for us to sit under during the holiday, I..."  
"You... WHAT?"  
"I_ I... will not let you fuck me" Never were you good at threatening sweetie. You wouldn't last a sec.  
"Now you really HAVE lost your fucking mind" To say the least.  
"So...? I am waiting"  
"I thought you said I can't fuck you"  
"It's not what I'm waiting for, asshole" ..... Since when?  
"What ARE you waiting for then?"  
"For you to change your mind"  
"JUSTIN. I'm really horny and..."  
"I don't give a fuck. Unless you agree on celebrating, I won't let you fuck me" Persistent, aren't we?  
"Are you serious about this?"  
"Damn serious. Does it look like I'm joking?"  
"Oops. No joke I see... Shit! My dick is itchy..."  
"That's your problem. Deal with it" HEY! It isn't my fucking job to deal with it but yours.  
"Don't you even care? Justin, come on"  
"Not until you agree"  
"Christ! You are fucking stubborn. Where in hell did you learn that?"  
"I learned it from the master. Now what do you say? Is my ass worth the challenge?" ... Do birds fly?  
"Fuck Yeah!"  
"So? This is it? Do you promise to buy us a tree?"  
"Justin, the whole fucking loft will stink and I don't think there are any trees left"  
"Then check it next thing tomorrow morning. PLEASE?"  
"Does it mean I can fuck you now?"  
"Fuck Yeah!"  
"Alright then. Consider it done... In the Kinney Residence Christmas shall be celebrated"  
..... "By the way, I wasn't serious you know" Duh? Like you could survive a minute without my cock.  
"I know. You never are"  
"Then why did you agree?"  
"I was trying to make you feel good. Did it work?"  
"You made me feel OK but you know what?"  
"What?"  
"Having you inside me will make me feel so much better"  
"That makes the two of us. Now come..."  
"As soon you will, my dear"  


.... Damn. I fucking love Christmas.


End file.
